A couple of weeks ago I wrote about my friend Laurie, a housewife and mom in my small hometown near Seattle. She is also the mom of an only child who happens to be a good friend of my nine-year-old son, Eitan.

You may recall Laurie has been having concerns about her heart, some palpitations and pain. Her Dad has had heart problems too. Weeks ago I told Laurie to “do not pass go, go see a cardiologist.” The other night I saw Laurie in the supermarket. I asked about her son, who had been sick. “He’s doing much better, thank you,” she responded. “And what did the doctor say?” I asked. Laurie smiled, “I’ve been so busy, I haven’t called yet. I know I should. Maybe this week.”

Laurie is the household manager and her son is the apple of her eye. Everything else takes precedence over her health.

Maybe you know someone like this. Some might say she is incredibly giving and selfless. Others might say she is foolish.

Is she really putting her son first? Or is she putting him last as she risks her ability to be there for him. If she has a coronary, her son will lose too.

Now we all know the saying “You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink.” But I really think she should be seen by a doctor. Should I be doing more?

I did bring it up with her husband when I saw him. He was troubled and hadn’t heard about her heart concerns. He asked for the number for the doctor, which I gladly gave him. I hope I didn’t spark a fight, but I don’t want to lose her either. Am I being pushy or a good friend?

–Andrew